4R,4G,4H and 4T students assignment for this school holiday !

Dear Students ! Happy using the new 1Malaysia GreatWall Netbook !......he following are your assignment diuring the holiday ! When you are finished....feel free to e-mail me back at : kalry60@hotmail.com......Happy holiday and Happy writing !

ASSIGNMENT 1

Subject - Verb Agreement

Underline the correct verbs.

1. Do you ( cycle, cycles ) or ( walk , walks ) to school?
2. My sister ( is, are ) not in. She ( has , have ) just gone out.
3. He usually ( come , comes ) back from work in the evening.
4. The men ( exercise , exercises ) three times a week.
5. The workers ( cut , cuts ) the grass once a fortnight.
6. We ( sweep , sweeps ) the floor every day.
7. The principal ( is , are ) giving a speech.
8. The children ( is, are ) taking part in the singing contest.

Redzuan: Do you know that the fight against Dengue goes beyond lip service? It needs action! Ling : Why do you say so? Redzuan: Research has shown that more than 70% of the breeding ground for the dreaded Aedes is found within the compound of residential homes. Ling : What action should we take to overcome this problem? Redzuan: It is essential to take time and effort to destroy all breeding grounds. Ling : I am busy with my daily routine. Therefore, I am unable to check the breeding grounds. Redzuan: Do you know that our selfish attitude can bring harm to our family and neighbours? So, let’s be responsible. Act today to ensure a compound that’s clean and safe. Ling : What should we do? Redzuan: We should discard Styrofoam containers, bottles, plastic bags, old tyres, flower pots and plates or any objects that can hold water for days. Ling : We need to tie the rubbish bag and dispose it properly. Redzuan: Yes, that’s right. If you are not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. Let’s do our part and be free from Aedes. (Source: The Star)

READING COMPREHENSION

1. What does lip service mean?
2. Is it necessary to destroy breeding grounds? Give a reason for your answer.
3. Why can’t breeding grounds be eradicated?
4. What does the word dreaded mean?

WRITING

While you and your friends were waiting to go home, a friend of yours was badly hurt. The principal asked you to write a report describing what had happened. Use the clues given in the brackets to complete the report .

To the Principal,

SMK _________________________

____________(Title)___________

With regards to the above matter, I would like to give an overview of what had happened at our school car park, on …….( date and time )………….. While my friends,…(names)……………. and I were waiting for our …..( transportation)….., we decided to have a game of football to kill time.

We played at the car park just outside the school gate. There were many …..(describe the place at that time )…. Suddenly, ….(name)….kicked the ball too hard and it flew high and hit one of the cars parked there. It was a …..(describe the car - model, colour ,registration number)…………………….................... The ball hit the windscreen and ………………..( describe the damage it caused)……………………………….

My friend, …(name)…,who was standing beside the car, was …..(describe the injury: which part of the body was hurt, blood loss, the reaction of other friends )……………………………………………. Fortunately, ….(mention a teacher’s name and what he/she did)…………………………………………………

We were at fault, therefore, we would like to……..( apologise ). We realise that ……………………………( mention a lesson learnt). We promise that …………………………..………….

Prepared by,

…(name)….

… ( date )..

SUMMARY

KUALA LUMPUR: Mohd Zubiar Zainol of Kedah emerged as the star performer in the opening leg of the SportExcel-NSC-Milo National Junior Circuit Artistic Championships held at the Bukit Jalil Sports Centre yesterday. Zubiar, a 16 year old student at the Bukit Jalil Sports School, was ecstatic over his four gold performances. He won the individual all-round title. He also emerged as the champion in the rings, parallel and horizontal bars events. “This is my biggest ever gold haul in a junior meet. My previous best, was a three-gold haul in last year’s MSSM Championships,” Zubiar exclaimed happily. He explained that he had to practise six hours per day at the gymnasium under the supervision of a personal coach from Russia. He had to sacrifice his leisure time like watching television and going to the cinemas. Furthermore, he had to keep to a strict diet to be fit for the championships. He remarked that all his hard work had paid off. Zubiar, who also won a silver and two bronzes in the recent SUKMA, is now eyeing for more glory in next month’s ASEAN Schools Championship in Singapore. “I hope to win at least one gold in the championships,” Zubiar said. Write a summary on Mohd Zubiar Zainol’s hard work and achievements in sports. Begin your summary as follows: Mohd Zubiar Zainol is a young star performer who had won the …

New Straits Times_Article from Andrew Choo

AS major exams draw near and students race against time to prepare themselves, many questions will plague teenage minds, such as “Would I be able to score straight As?” “Would what I read come out?” “What if I study ABC but DEF comes out?!” Andrew Choo tells DEBORAH TEE, 17 and MANPREET KAUR, 15, about the sort of help students can get in these dire times.

Andrew Choo is best known as ‘the man who provides excellent exam tips!’ It all started in 1986, when a little boy said to him, “Andrew, you have to help me study for my exams.” Andrew replied jokingly, “If I help you study, you’d be guaranteed to get all As.” And the little boy, taking him seriously, gave him an idea that would change Andrew’s life forever. “If you can guarantee me all As, why don’t you set up a tuition centre and you can be successful!” Andrew hadn’t thought of it before, and when the little boy said it, epiphany struck! It didn’t sound very much at first, but after seven sleepless nights, he made the decision that had his career taking off.

He first started out as a home tutor, and after receiving praises as well as encouragement from many, he set up his first tuition centre in 1993. Being a visionary, he wasted no time afterwards in expanding his business by setting up an online site in the year 2006.

The first sentence to come out of Andrew Choo’s mouth when we sat down to interview him was - “We are not selling soalan bocor, we are only selling spotted questions.” It is true that he has been giving tips but one should not consider these essential tips as “soalan bocor” or leaked questions as they are actually predicted or forecasted questions.

His predictions for the recent PMR trial examination were so accurate that he received a call from the Ministry of Education saying they would have to carry out investigations on him. Andrew Choo sells these predictions or what he calls “special tips”. The price range is from RM140 to RM230. “If you order the tips earlier, you will get them cheaper”. These ‘tips’ will normally be sent out 10 days before the examination. Whoever ordered the PMR ‘tips’ would probably have received them last week. For those who are sitting for the SPM examination this year, don’t fret, as you will be receiving the tips before the examination as well! According to Andrew, they can only spot or predict what questions will be asked, the rest of the effort has to come from the students.

You must be wondering, how he gets these ‘tips’? Well, firstly, you may clear your doubts about Andrew Choo being linked to anyone in the Ministry of Education. What he actually uses is simple mathematics - there is a special trend and pattern to look out for when spotting questions. For example, based on the topics in the syllabus, 30% to 33% of it would not be appearing at all. Out of the remaining 60%, 30% consists of past year questions and the other 30% is what Andrew focuses on. Pure technique!

Andrew doesn’t do all the predictions himself, the ‘tips’ are actually the result of teamwork. “We select the teachers who assist us in spotting the questions’’. As he quotes, “You don’t need to cook Maggi mee, we will make the Maggi, you just need to pour some water only”.

Andrew’s seminars are also a hit with exam students. He recently conducted a PMR seminar at Universiti Malaya and the response was amazing! It was actually a full house.

The online notes he provides students with, are the same notes he gives to his tuition students and those who attend his seminar as well. “We minus all the nonsense, and it’s a very handy book” is how Andrew describes the concise notes. In 2007, the accuracy of his ‘tips’ was low and Andrew received a lot of blame but since 2008, the accuracy of his ‘tips’ is very high! Many students from Selangor, log in to his online website www.andrewchoo.edu.my to get tips for their trial examination. “When the students find out that the tips are accurate, they feel confident”. He added that many schools are buying his tips. “If school A orders the tips, School B will surely order it also!” If you would like to get your hands on the state papers for free, be sure to visit his website!

His advice to students is to print out all the trial papers, circle all the answers and only read the ones you don’t understand well. “You don’t have to study for 8 hours but you must study smart for an hour, provided you don’t forget what you have studied,” he added.

So, to all of you ‘exam students’ out there, don’t forget to log in to his website to get all the exam papers for FREE! Plus, if you are interested, you may still purchase the tips for SPM and PMR! Details are all on his website!
All the best for your examinations!

Read more: Spotting Questions http://www.nst.com.my/nst/articles/SpottingQuestions/Article/#ixzz12lWD7E3h

Sample Composition with corrections 1

Essay : Leisure Time

Everyone has different ways of spending his or her free time. As for me, I usually do reading when I have free time. Most of the time, I read alone. I think because of through reading, I can find out how beautiful this discover the beauty of the world. is.

When I was young, my parents were always busy working.; Therefore, they bought me a lot of books to keep me company accompany me. Through reading, I have made friends with the Three Little Pigs, Snow White, Red Riding Hood, and so on. Since then, reading is has become an important part of my life. Books, magazines, or newspaper are very handy to carry around with. The smallness of sizes and the lightweights of reading materials made it very convenient for me to put them into my handbag. so various that I can pick up any size of them with me at anytime. Besides, Moreover, I can read whenever and wherever I choose to. at anytime, Even just a shred during an interval of time, like waiting for a bus or at break time at in school or at work.; Some people even use time to read while they are in the toilets. In short, I can enjoy reading no matter when or where.

In addition to the convenience, reading also enriches my life, brings gives me a lot of fun, and releases me from the my pressures of modern living. I live in Taiwan and I'm an elementary school teacher. While reading books on of travel, like “Lonely Planet” for example, I would got to know what about other countries are like and what their cultures and customs too. ; also, I can also get to would know about other peoples' stories through reading their biographies. Besides, while reading, When I am immersed in a novel for example, I share can experience the same feelings, such as excitement, sadness and happiness, with the characters in the books. I went to the Hogwarts with Harry Potter, fell in love with Romeo and Juliet, and decoded secret ancient codes with The Da Vinci Code; all of which brought me enormous pleasure. such a good time. With Through reading, I can forget all about this material set aside all the cares of this material world and just dive into the world books provide. Reading relieves me from the burdens of the life, and serves as an outlet for my frustrations.

I usually do reading alone when I have free time. Reading alone doesn't make me antisocial. mean that I don't like to read with others., It is just because most of time, I'm I happen to be alone when I have free time. In short, doing reading when I'm free can broaden my horizons, mind make me happy, and help me relax.


After Correction

　

Everyone has different ways of spending his or her free time. As for me, I usually do reading when I have free time. Most of the time, I read alone. I think through reading, I can discover the beauty of the world.

When I was young, my parents were always busy working. Therefore, they bought me a lot of books to keep me company. Through reading, I have made friends with the Three Little Pigs, Snow White, Red Riding Hood, and so on. Since then, reading has become an important part of my life. Books, magazines or newspaper are very handy to carry around with. The smallness of size and the lightweight of reading materials made it very convenient for me to put them into my handbag. Moreover, I can read whenever and wherever I choose to. Even during an interval of time, like waiting for a bus or at break time in school or at work. Some people even read while they are in the toilets. In short, I can enjoy reading no matter when or where.

In addition to the convenience, reading also enriches my life, gives me a lot of fun, and releases me from the pressures of modern living. I live in Taiwan and I'm an elementary school teacher. While reading books on travel, like “Lonely Planet” for example, I got to know about other countries and their cultures and customs too. I can also get to know about other peoples' stories through their biographies. When I am immersed in a novel for example, I can experience the same feelings, such as excitement, sadness and happiness, with the characters in the books. I went to the Hogwarts with Harry Potter, fell in love with Romeo and Juliet, and decoded secret ancient codes with The Da Vinci Code; all of which brought me enormous pleasure. Through reading, I can set aside all the cares of this material world and just dive into the world books provide. Reading relieves me from the burdens of life, and serves as an outlet for my frustrations.

I usually do reading alone when I have free time. Reading alone doesn't make me anti-social. It is just because most of time, I happen to be alone when I have free time. In short, doing reading when I'm free can broaden my horizons, make me happy, and help me relax.

　

Corrected and explained

　

Everyone has different ways of spending his or her free time. As for me, I usually do reading when I have free time. Most of the time,(“the” is necessary here) I read alone. I think because of (You are not wrong, but I just thought “through” is a better word) through reading, I can find out how beautiful this (“discover” is a much more emotional word than “find out”. “Beauty of the world” sounds better) discover the beauty of the world. is.

When I was young, my parents were always (emphasize “always” to give it a stronger feel) busy working.; Therefore, they bought me a lot of (“a lot of” gives tells the reader more than just buying “books”) books to keep me company (You are not wrong, but try “keeping me company” as a variation) accompany me. Through reading, I have (“have made”, “have eaten”, “have taken”) made friends with the Three Little Pigs, Snow White, Red Riding (Don't forget the “Riding”) Hood, and so on. Since then, reading is has become (“Has become” stresses the fact that it was never before) an important part of my life. Books, magazines, (No “,” when you have the “or”) or newspaper are very handy to carry around with. (emphasize that you want to “carry them around”) The smallness of sizes and the lightweights (“sizes and weights” is not wrong, but sounds like an expression used in your science books) of reading materials made it very convenient for me to put them into my handbag. (Make your description more graphic, like “putting in your handbag” so the reader will try to picture or imagine what you are doing) so various that I can pick up any size of them with me at anytime. Besides, Moreover, (meaning besides) I can read whenever and wherever (meaning anytime and anywhere) I choose to. at anytime, Even just a shred during an interval (Not “shred of time” but “interval of time”) of time, like waiting for a bus or at break time at in school or at work.; Some people even use time to read while they are in the toilets. In short, I can enjoy reading no matter when or where.

In addition to the convenience, reading also (“also” because it is an additional point you are making) enriches my life, brings gives (“bring” is not wrong.) me a lot of fun, and releases me from the my pressures of modern living.(Pressure from what? Why not tell the reader it is from modern living) I live in Taiwan and I'm an elementary school teacher. While reading books on of travel, like “Lonely Planet” for example (“Lonely Planet” is a popular book about travel), I would got to know what about other countries are like and what their cultures and customs too. ; also, I can also get to (“get to know” as in trying or attempting to find out about something) would know about other peoples' stories through reading their biographies. Besides, while reading, When I am immersed (“immersed” as in very indulged or very focused in doing something) in a novel (Novel, why not tell what you are reading) for example, I share can experience (“share's is alright, but experience is a feeling of been into something physically. A more powerful way to describe your feelings) the same feelings, such as excitement, sadness and happiness, with the characters in the books. I went to the Hogwarts with Harry Potter, fell in love with Romeo and Juliet, and decoded secret ancient codes with The Da Vinci Code; all of which brought me enormous pleasure.(“enormous” means “big or huge”) such a good time. With Through reading, I can forget all about this material set aside all the cares of this material (or all the woes of this world. Meaning the worries or concerns) world and just dive into the world books provide. Reading relieves me from the burdens of the life, and serves as an outlet for my frustrations.(An “outlet” is a “channel” and in this context, it means to vent your anger, or frustrations)

I usually do reading alone when I have free time. Reading alone doesn't make me antisocial.(“Antisocial” means not wanting to be around people or doing things that others disapprove of, socially) mean that I don't like to read with others., It is just because most of time, I'm I happen to be (“Happen to be” means “by chance” like “I happened to see him at the department store) alone when I have free time. In short, doing reading when I'm free can broaden my horizons, (Your “horizons” are the things you know, or your knowledge base, so to speak) mind make me happy, and help me relax.

　

Sample Composition with corrections 2

An Unforgettable Experience

It happened many years ago, when I was a little girl. I can neither remember the beginning nor the end , but whenever I think of the scene, my tears flowed freely (1) down my cheeks.

When I was young, my family led a poor life in country (2). That evening (3), the weather was very bad, it rained cats and dogs (4). Just at the evening (5), my families (6) were on our way home. Dad held me on his back, Mom held my elder brother’s hand, and held the only umbrella for Dad and me. Dad gave his overcoat to my elder brother. As you know (7), the road of country is difficult for people to walk, especially in rainy days. However, they waded (8) together like this (9) in the rain. But I wasn’t comfortable either. I was fat at that time, perhaps it was hard for Dad to hold me for such a long time, for he had almost fallen down (10) for several times (11). In order to decrease the weight to Dad, tried to hold myself-----just in mind, though it sounded funny and did nothing (12).

When we arrived home, the inner of our house was raining (13) too. Rain dropped from the bad roof everywhere. Mom put bowls and tubs at the right places for rain. Then she put me and my elder brother on dry places of bed (14). I fell asleep soon. When I opened my eyes, I found Dad and Mom were sleeping in chairs, they caught a bad cold.

This is the earliest memory in my mind, and luckily, it is nothing but my parents’ love, I touched parents’ great love (15) for the first time. Though the evening went away (16), and now we live a happy life, I won’t forget the rain we lived through together, the evening will stay in my mind forever.

Comments:

The basic ideas of this composition are very clear and well-written. It is well-organized and easy to read. However, there are many small mistakes that could be improved. As with most students' compositions, more specific details would have also made it much better.

(1) "whenever I think of the scene, my tears flowed freely down my cheeks" "Whenever" means anytime, which could also be now or in the future, so we should use "flow" rather than the past tense.

(2) "in country" This should be "in the country".

(3) "That evening" "That" refers back to a previously mentioned evening, but the writer didn't mention an evening before. It would be better to write "One evening".

(4) "it rained cats and dogs" Many students rely too much on old, worn-out phrases. Good writing is fresh and includes concrete details. The writer could try something like this: "It had rained hard all day and the old, dirt roads were flooded with water".

(5) "Just at the evening" This should be "In the evening".

(6) "my families" We all have only one family. "My family and I" or "All the members of my family and I" would be better.

(7) "as you know" This phrase is very rarely used and should be reserved for a time when we truly want to emphasize that our readers are aware of a certain fact. In this case, I actually do NOT know that country roads are all difficult to walk on.

(8) "waded" It sounds as though the water was very deep. If that was true, the writer should have already told us "the water covering the road was more than 50cm deep", or something similar. If it is not true, then the writer could write "walked through the heavy rain".

(9) "together like this" "Like this" refers back to a way of walking, but the writer described the country road in the previous sentence, not how they were walking.

(10) "he had almost fallen down" This should be "he almost fell down". We only use "had fallen" if we want to emphasize a previous time when he almost fell. For example, "He had almost fallen down several times before, so now his steps were especially careful".

(11) "for several times" We do not need "for" in this case.

(12) "just in mind, though it sounded funny and did nothing" I have no idea what this means! What is "in mind"? Whose mind is it in? What sound was made? What could it have done if it hadn't done nothing? The whole sentence is very confusing.

(13) "the inner of our house was raining" This sounds as though there were rain clouds inside the house, perhaps with lightning and thunder! Of course, the inside of the house was probably only full of rain water.

(14) "put me on dry places of bed" This should be "put me on a dry spot on the bed".

(15) "I touched parents' great love" "Touch" is not the right word. Maybe "realize", "understood" or possibly "came in touch with" would better express the writer's feeling.

(16) "the evening went away" Evenings do not go away. We could say "the evening ended" or "the evening came to an end".

Revised Composition:

My First Unforgettable Evening

It happened many years ago, when I was a little girl. I can neither remember the beginning nor the end , but whenever I think of the scene, tears flow freely down my cheeks.

When I was young, my family led a poor life in the country. One evening we were visiting some relatives and the weather was very bad. It rained so hard that the roads were flooded with water. On our way home that evening, my Dad carried me on his back. My Mom held my elder brother’s hand, and held an umbrella for Dad and me. Dad gave his overcoat to my elder brother. As you can imagine, many country roads are difficult to walk on. This road was especially bad after the rain. However, we trudged together through the mud and the rain for more than an hour.

Though I was on my Dad's back, I wasn’t comfortable either. I was fat at that time and it may have been hard for Dad to hold me for such a long time. He almost fell down four or five times. In hopes of decreasing my father's burden, I tried to "carry" myself, through force of will alone. That may sound funny, but I was just a kid. Of course, I achieved nothing.

When we arrived home, the inside of our house was covered with rain water. The rain had come through our leaky roof and puddles were everywhere. Mom put bowls and tubs all around the house to try to catch the rain. Then she put me and my elder brother to bed, carefully placing us on the remaining dry spots. I fell asleep soon. When I opened my eyes, I found Dad and Mom were sleeping in chairs, both having caught bad colds.

This is my very earliest memory, and luckily, it represents nothing but my parents’ love. I realized the depth of my parents’ great love for the first time. Though the evening has long since passed, and now we live a happy life, I won’t forget the rain we lived through together. The rain, that evening, and especially my parents' love, will stay in my mind forever.

Ah Beng's letter to Ah Lian‏

Dear Form 3 Students ... read the letter below..identify the errrors..rewrite the letter in the correct version and e-mail it to me at :kalry60@hotmail.com..the earliest to response will get a Raya present from me..........


Dear Ah Lian,

Thanks you for your letter. Wrong time no see you. How everything? For me, I am quiet find. You say in your letter your taukeh soh want you to chain your look?
Somemore you must wear kick kok soo, hope you can wok properly.

You know, Ah Kau Kia working in a soft where company now. Last week, he take
I, Muthu & few of his friend to May Nonut to eat barger. After that he take we all go to kalah ok. Muthu sing and sing no stop until the sky bright.

Next week, my father mother going to sellerbread 20 years annie wear sari. My father mother going to give a fist to all the kampong people. So you must come with your hole family. I only hope one day we no need to write and send letter to you and to me. Better I e-meow you, you e-meow me.

I will ketchup with you soon. And when you got time, please few free to call me.

Goo bye.....

Worm regard,
Ah Beng

PMR Tips_ Writing Essay

Analysis of past years questions and ..... prediction and tips- Guided Writing

• 2000 Informal letter & picture series
• 2001 Giving opinion & newspaper article
• 2002 Newspaper article & report for magazine
• 2003 Giving opinion & description of robbery
• 2004 Speech & Article
• 2005 Report on National Day Celebration (picture series & note expansion)
• 2006 Informal letter - Letter to uncle (note expansion)
• 2007 Story (picture series & note expansion) •
• 2008 Speech – ‘Safety Measures in School’ (picture series & note expansion)
• 2009 Article - experience at an old folks' home (picture series & note expansion)
• 2010 What will come out this year???? It could be a report, a letter (formal or informal) or a story. And maybe opinion based essay that has not been tested since 2001.

Tips in writing essays

1. Understand the task given

e. g. a. Study the pictures carefully. Imagine you are one of the people in the picture. Describe

what happened. Basically understand the situation stated in the question.

b. Look at the task at hand. Write a speech / Write an article. Do look

at the structures wanted... for example: persuade your uncle.
c. Determine the tenses/ time for the task. If it is an article recount – Past tense/ time

2. Use the rubrics in their given form.

e. g. Shopping – many people – curious- crowd – watching – snake charmer

– saw – pick pocket – wallet -

3. Use all the notes given in the question.
4. Always write in paragraphs to organize your ideas. (Main point, elaboration, examples)
5. Use linkers to correlate one paragraph to the other.

e.g.

To show difference - On the other hand, In contrast, On the contrary, However,

Despite, To add to point - In addition, Besides, As a result, Similarly,

6. Use the correct format

a. formal / informal letter – know where the address and signature should be.
Remember: "yours faithfully" is use only for formal letter.

b. Talk / speech – must have title, greetings to the audience, end with thank you.

c. Report – must have title and the name of the person who wrote the report at the bottom.

d. Article – must have title and appear formal

e. Giving opinion – must make sure to state your opinion at the beginning of the essay.

Letter of Complaint: More Sample Essay and tips on elaboration of points

Your class is unhappy with your school canteen. As the monitor of your class, you have been asked to write to your principal, to complain about the following:

- food left uncovered

- attract many flies

- food served is stale

- food too expensive

- oily plates and cups

- rude workers

- workers not properly attired

- dustbins not cleared daily

- same menu daily

In your letter, you would also like to offer three suggestions from your classmates:

- stringent checks

- cheaper food

- serve a variety of food

When writing the letter, you should remember:

- to set out the letter correctly

- to include all the points given

- to write in paragraphs.

(35 marks)

Look at the model answer below to revise the format of a formal letter and see how the points are elaborated.

The Class Monitor,

Form 3 Amanah,

SMK Kayu Ara Pasong,

82010 Pontian,

Johore.

Encik Juhair bin Jumaat,

The Principal,

SMK Kayu Ara Pasong,

82010 Pontian,

Johore.

6 OCTOBER 2010

Dear Sir,

Unsatisfactory School Canteen

On behalf of the students of 3 Amanah, I would like to lodge a complaint about the school canteen.

2. First and foremost, the food served is not covered and many flies can be seen hovering over the food. This may lead to food poisoning. Moreover, the canteen also serves stale food. The ‘nasi lemak’ turns bad by the time the upper forms have their recess. Last week, a few of us had diarrhoea after consuming food from the canteen.

3. Apart from that, the food is also too expensive. A small plate of fried mee costs RM1.50 and many poor students cannot afford it. Besides that, the canteen serves the same menu daily. The students are bored with fried rice and fried mee every day.

4. Another complaint is that the cups and plates are oily and not washed properly. The workers are also not appropriately attired although they have been told to wear aprons and caps. Moreover, these workers are rude to students. They shout at us and use foul language whenever they get angry. They also do not clear the dustbins and rubbish daily. This is very unhygienic. As a result, there is a foul stench whenever we eat in the canteen.

5. Thus, we would like to suggest that the school authorities make stringent checks on the canteen daily or weekly. They should also ensure that the canteen serves a variety of food at a reasonable price.

We would like to appeal to your sense of fairness and hope prompt action will be taken regarding these matters.

Yours faithfully,

(NORLISSA BT DUSUKI)

3 Amanah

Note how the points given are arranged into paragraphs and elaborated where needed.

The last paragraph states the action you want taken.

To elaborate on a point, you may:

- give a reason

- state one effect/outcome

- give details

- explain further with facts or statistics

- give an opinion

Let’s look at some examples from the sample essay.

1. food left uncovered - attract many flies

First and foremost, the food served is left uncovered and many flies can be seen hovering over the food. This may lead to food poisoning.

Since the two points are connected, group them in one sentence. It is all right if you do not wish to use the exact words given but you must stick to the original meaning when writing. The underlined sentence are elaborated by stating one possible effect of the flies.

Remember that you only need to give a sentence or a phrase. Do not elaborate more than three or four lines. You will be wasting your time and effort.

2. same menu daily

Besides that, the canteen serves the same menu daily. The students are bored with fried rice and fried mee every day.

The phrase “same menu” is elaborated by giving a few examples.

Can you identify more examples of elaboration and the methods used?

Pay attention to the structures in the sample essay above.

Notice how the use of First and foremost, Moreover, Apart from that, Besides that, Another complaint is and so on. These are transitional words and phrases which help to make the essay flow smoothly and to lead the reader from one point to another.

You can use many other transitional words and phrases to make your essay more cohesive.

1. To add to what you have just said: also, similarly, furthermore, in addition, then, moreover, in other words, in the same way
2. To use a specific example to support what you have said: For example, especially, for instance, to illustrate, as an illustration, such as
3. To show sequence: First and foremost, first, The second advantage is, Next, Another reason is, Lastly, Finally
4. To indicate that you are about to contrast what has just been said: but, on the other hand, yet, nevertheless, on the contrary, however
5. To indicate a conclusion: In conclusion, consequently, thus, therefore, in summary, therefore, as a result